Lou,

i thought i wouldn't think about it.

and I believe these hands have become more wrinkled.

i keep investing so sparingly, keeping so much to myself. there is a lot of selfishness in this soul of mine. a lot more than i would like for you to see. but please don't look away.
for there is goodness in the land and a promise of victory. there is purity beyond measure and restoration that i am beginning to learn something about.


“The service of forgiveness is rendered by one to the others daily. It occurs, without words, in the intercessions for one another.” Bonhoeffer

and i ask in pleading words of lacking wisdom for intervention. i beg for truth in this heart of mine that would speak softly and confidently to your broken and devastated spirit. there is no judgment. for there is one that you cannot stand but cannot stand without. and you try to pass off this massacre as an everyday pain, internal breaking of an undesired heart.
and i hide how much it hurts to know so much and act so little.